10.14.2009

OVERRATED

Here they are, somewhat the province of the solitary observer, items I’ve been meaning to put in their place; acts, objects, things, traits heretofore elevated somehow in current popular status, that I declare to be overrated.. (and in no apparent order)

--Hair, in general; shave it off, let it grow, color it? Whatever. It comes and goes, so let it go..
--Perez Hilton; why is this hack exalted? Who gives him the soapbox? Dunno..
--Backing into parking spaces; why, I ask? Solely reserved for drivers of pickup trucks that can’t seem to be able to maneuver these behemoths, so they cheat, back into spaces, rather than back out? Perplexing, especially when this habit is extended to four cylinder autos..
--The Final Four; hey, I’m a fan, but let’s face it, March Madness isn’t so much about hoops as a general post-winter madness, cabin fever, and the promise that baseball is around the corner…college b-ball in front of any more than 10,000 fans in a stale, musty gym is way beyond what Naismith had in mind…
--College Football playoffs; okay, not actually in existence. . .YET. . .but the whole discussion reeks of new money, those who can’t just enjoy college guys playing ball, and the ‘I have to be Number One’ syndrome. Go to the Rose Bowl, Pac 10-Big Ten, and tell me how you feel..
--Hummers—the vehicle; If you have to ask why, you don’t deserve the answer..
--Dancing With The Stars; have to admit, I’ve never actually seen it. But anything having to do with ex-athletes, washed up politicians and ‘B’ list players getting prime time with hot chicks, is, well, not exactly what I’d call a productive use of time. Their’s, not yours. Okay, your’s either. Gone are the days when jocks drove delivery trucks in the off season so they could get to know their fans, then sold insurance until they died.
--Running—it’s just wrong. Bad on the joints, the whole lower body--just bad. Swim, hike, bike, walk, but run? Nah. Rather spin the treadmill, play air-guitar, chase moths. NO RUNNING. Should be a sign up everywhere.
--Dodger Stadium—just another nice place to play baseball, nothing special, nothing classic or timeless. Face it LA, most of you grew up loving the Dodgers, so I can’t blame you. Check out ATT Park, Wrigley, Camden Yards, Petco, Coors, and find out what you’re missing. Can’t even find a sign for the off-ramp. Why? O’Malley chose to finance the stadium himself and couldn’t get the city to pop for even a freeway sign. Nice parking lot with a stadium.
--Pete Carroll—not in the won lost sense, but in the sense that when his players get arrested, get involved in, shall we say campus shenanigans (and leave it at that), Uncle Pete is the first to deflect the questions, defer to the ‘we’ll wait and see what develops’ kind of response, and NEVER EVER comes out and says ‘we don’t tolerate this behavior on this team, at this school, or on this campus’, thereby making the kind of statement every other coach is quick to do. If you like the W-L record, Pete is your man. Check the rap sheets of the players, to find out the coaching philosophy of Carroll.

I believe we’ll stop it right here, for now..

2 comments:

mendoman said...

Twattering is a malapropism for finger fucking and externalizing inner monologue simultaneously. Is randomness worthy of a sequel? BTW: What's become of plain old texting?

mendoman said...

yeah...and Mike Garret will eventually have to retire Carroll. Carroll, Shanahan or Holmgren are all the rightful heirs to the Bill Walsh legacy. They were his star pupils. Anyone of them would make great 49er head coaches after Singletary wears out his welcome with the idiotic OC hire in Jimmy Ray. WTF was the guy thinking? When he sacked Martz in his first move, you knew he was insecure of having an offensive innovator on his staff -- thus the retread Ray hire. You can't avg 3 yards per snap in NFL -- it's gotta be 4 yards per play!!!